A public school teacher was arrested today at Manchester International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Britains Home Secretary John Reid, said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the Met Police with carrying Weapons of Maths Instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Reid said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like ‘x` and `y` and refer to themselves as unknowns,` but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, `There are 3 sides to every triangle.“

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said,"If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."



   Why Can’t We Be Like The Australian’s?

Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told on Wednesday to get out of Australia, as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks

A day after a group of mainstream Muslim leaders pledged loyalty to Australia and her Queen at a special meeting with Prime Minister John Howard, he and his Ministers made it clear that extremists would face a crackdown.  Treasurer Peter Costello, seen as heir apparent to Howard, hinted that some radical clerics could be asked to leave the country if they did not accept that Australia was a secular state, and its laws were made by parliament. "If those are not your values, if you want a country which has Sharia law or a theocratic state, then Australia is not for you," he said on national television.

"I’d be saying to clerics who are teaching that there are two laws governing people in Australia : one the Australian law and another the Islamic law, that is false. If you can’t agree with parliamentary law, independent courts, democracy, and would prefer Sharia law and have the opportunity to go to another country, which practices it, perhaps, then, that’s a better option," Costello said.

Asked whether he meant radical clerics would be forced to leave, he said those with dual citizenship could possibly be asked to move to the other country. Education Minister Brendan Nelson later told reporters that Muslims who did not want to accept local values should ‘clear off’. "Basically people who don’t want to be Australians, and who don’t want to live by Australian values and understand them, well then, they can basically clear off," he said.

Separately, Howard angered some Australian Muslims on Wednesday by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation’s mosques. "IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave it. I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali, we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians"

"However, the dust from the attacks had barely settled when the ‘politically correct’ crowd began complaining about the possibility that our patriotism was offending others. I am not against immigration, nor do I hold a grudge against anyone who is seeking a better life by coming to Australia. However, there are a few things that those who have recently come to our country, and apparently some born here, need to understand. This idea of Australia being a multicultural community has served only to dilute our sovereignty and our national identity.  As Australians, we have our own culture, our own society, our own language and our own lifestyle.
This culture has been developed over two centuries of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom
We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society, Learn the language!
Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right; wing, political push, but a fact, because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture.
We will accept your beliefs, and will not question why All we ask is that you accept ours, and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us."

"If the Southern Cross offends you, or you don’t like " A Fair Go," then you should seriously consider a move to another part of the planet. We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change, and we really don’t care how you did things where you came from. By all means, keep your culture, but do not force it on others."

"This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom, ‘THE RIGHT TO LEAVE.’"

"If you aren’t happy here then LEAVE. We didn’t force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted."



  1. this is of course what the brits call bigotry when an american states it… as for being of the chrisitan right…I think you have read a lot into my blogs that simply do not exist…Laird if you want to joust, at least you could joust about things that are written rather than about things you conclude based on premises that I am simply not working from…I said nothing about republicans other than about their partisanship…neither did I reference any born again christian view…let alone endorse it…you may need to reread my words I know they are probably not as clear as they should be, but I do not recall implying what you inferred…

  2. Pleased you could make it over. Bigotry – not really just how the american who emailed it to me thinks, I just happen to agree.
    Seems to me the australians, as usual, are saying it as it is. If people emigrate,[legally or illegally], to our respective countries they should abide by our rules.

  3. remember reading about that – pity blair does nt stand up and say the same. If they don\’t like it  – let them sod off. I was crap at school when it came to doing my training for Al – Gebra !

  4. If only other countries would take such a strong stance and speak out as boldly. It does not take a genius to see that the world is being held to ransom by a culture that wishes to dominate and enforce and subject its nature and belief systems world wide. It is raising its ugly head in every country.

  5. Oh if only our \’beloved???\’ leaders would stand and say this to the whinging and whining \’others\’ in our fair land. Don\’t get me wrong…. I belong to a \’minority\’ beief so know full well how frustrating it can be. BUT I cannot build a Temple to worship in… my marriage to my beloved LoneWolf is not recognised and as for the right to worship in peace…….. well i just won\’t go there. I am treated as a freak by some and as nutty by others and this happens to many people who believe as i do. There are (at a rough estimate) over a half a million of us in this country. We abide by the laws pay our taxes, work just as hard and honour all other religions. BUT we don\’t have the same rights as them. So think on all Xtians, Muslims, Mormons, Hindus etc.
    Blessed Be
    A proud and longwinded member of the Wiccan/Pagan/ Witchcraft RELIGION

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